They couldn't have possibly been more different: separated by two continents, they grew up with vastly different backgrounds. There was no discernible commonality between them with exception of their career choices which ultimately caused them to meet in their mid 20's.
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A proposal at the second date was just the first of many choices that separated them - albeit jointly - from everybody else in their circles of friends and family.
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Getting married in a country where unions across ethnic lines were not only frowned upon, but even legally and institutionally actively discouraged, set the stage for a 10-year journey across Africa, Europe, and North America.
Defying conventions, dismissing other people's opinions, advice, preconceived notions and prejudices, they embraced hard work and long hours in the their jobs, but came to the conclusion that selling their life-time to a career, a boss, the government or a corporation didn't give them the time of their life.
What other way was there to escape the hamster-wheel? Work ethic they had aplenty. Yet, they realized that a life in which their own values (family, freedom, financial independence) persistently played second fiddle to the values others expected them to have was not the vision they had for their life together.
Spending 12-16 hours per day chasing a paycheck didn't give them the freedom, the stability and security they strived for.
Coming home after work, fatigued, exhausted and often cranky, too tired to engage in meaningful conversations or rejuvenating activities with each other or their kids was not giving them the fulfillment they so desperately sought.
Coming home after work, fatigued, exhausted and often cranky, too tired to engage in meaningful conversations or rejuvenating activities with each other or their kids was not giving them the fulfillment they so desperately sought.
Slowly, through insight gained from books, podcasts and the company of differently minded people, they came to the realization that a life's plan requires to be defined, refined and enshrined in a clear vision that is focused on the destination rather than on the mode of transport or the route you choose to take.
The Purpose of Life is a Life of Purpose
The destination was, they found out, not to retire to expire as so many people seem to believe. Nor could it ever be their life's purpose. For what would they leave behind ?
Realizing that neither a job nor 40 years of dedication to a career would give purpose to their lives, they decided to live in keeping with their values
A Dream and a Vision
For the next generation to step into their footsteps, they themselves needed to make these steps into cement, not on sand.
They needed to become clear about what life they were going to create for themselves.
They needed to create a vision.
They had to stop being mere dreamers, and start becoming visionaries, if they were ever to live the way they wanted to be remembered by.
They needed to become clear about what life they were going to create for themselves.
They needed to create a vision.
They had to stop being mere dreamers, and start becoming visionaries, if they were ever to live the way they wanted to be remembered by.
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Dreams are profoundly different from Visions: Dreams are flights of fancy, drifts of one's imagination, and often just a past-time. |
A Vision, however, is a directive, a scripted effort to effect change.
They had to write a script for their life.
They had to write a script for their life.
The Process of Becoming
The ancient Greeks understood the purpose of life to live in accordance with one's nature. Etymologically, the Greek word for nature is derived from the Greek verb 'to grow'.
It was clear, that they had to grow out of their old mentality, habits, and thought processes as well as their previous association, all of which had taken them to where they were at that point but couldn't take them further.
They were aware of the Growing Pains that children go through. It turned out that they themselves would have to go through growing pains again in their forties ... and for the rest of their lives.
It was clear, that they had to grow out of their old mentality, habits, and thought processes as well as their previous association, all of which had taken them to where they were at that point but couldn't take them further.
They were aware of the Growing Pains that children go through. It turned out that they themselves would have to go through growing pains again in their forties ... and for the rest of their lives.
They learned thus from people who themselves had fought their battles to get where both of them strived to be: living their lives dedicated to their vision and their purpose, but always aligned with their values and principles.
We grow through struggle. We grow outside of our comfort zone, we grow through pain, through discomfort and misfortune.
Sadly, man does much more to avoid pain in his life than he does to pursue pleasure. But avoidance of pain at all cost also implies the avoidance of growth !
That's why most people are happy to settle for less instead of settling for more.
The former was not an option, the latter had to become a commitment.
A Growing Company
Learning how to grow requires the expertise of people who have grown, who went through the valley of tears and emerged from it bigger, stronger, better. Spending time in the company of grown and growing people will leave imprints, that will normalize the struggle of growing for you and equip you to make this journey yourself.
Becoming the best that you are destined to become requires someone in your life who has done better than you and who can stretch you based on his experience, his paradigms, and his perspective.
You don't chase success, you attract it.
By becoming growth-oriented, they attracted the kind of growing individuals into their life whose company aided them in their effort to change themselves, and thus effect positive change in yet others.
You don't chase success, you attract it.
By becoming growth-oriented, they attracted the kind of growing individuals into their life whose company aided them in their effort to change themselves, and thus effect positive change in yet others.
Reason and Virtue
Living a fulfilled life means to find both purpose and happiness in life. A life of constant and never-ending growth (excellence) must be based on our capacity for reason and the ability to manage our emotions intelligently, to allow them to be advisors, but not dictators in our decision-making processes.
The ongoing development of this ability lends more focus, consistency and perseverance to our lives. Only if equipped with the tools of emotional intelligence, a compelling dream, a well laid-out roadmap, hunger, humility, aggressive patience, an elevated association of dreamers, visionaries and doers, and a lot of resilience can we hope to achieve the extraordinary results ordinary people will never achieve.
Resilience
In the course of their journey they encountered setbacks, failures, adversities, traumas and tragedies. Life proved to be fairly void of unicorns, rainbows and galavanting garden gnomes. Yet, developing one's emotional quotient, focusing on that what is within the individual's control (i.e, thoughts, feelings, words and actions), and the willingness to take responsibility for both one's successes and failures allowed them to take failures not as a verdict on their abilities, tragedies not as a judgment on their unworthiness, and the past not as a predictor of the future.
No amount of depression can alter the past, and no amount anxiety can change the future. The now, this very moment, this very split of a second is the only thing we ever have - living this very moment pureposefully is the only thing that counts. Living our lives intentionally and not accidentally is the only thing we can do to create a legacy.
Significance
Empowering other people, other families than just our own, to travel safely through the stages of Survival, Stability, Security, and Success to Significance is our mission and vision for our life.
By sharing our own story, our triumphs, our setbacks, our wins, our lessons and losses we hope to impact those that we choose to invest our time into.
We strive to serve as advisors and guides in the lives of those who allow us to become primary influencers in their lives based on the results we have attained for ourselves.
By offering a new perspective, a different paradigm, a novel mindset, as well as a positive attitude we hope to positively impact those who accept that inner change must precede outer change and that embracing one's discomfort zone is non-negotiable.
By sharing our own story, our triumphs, our setbacks, our wins, our lessons and losses we hope to impact those that we choose to invest our time into.
We strive to serve as advisors and guides in the lives of those who allow us to become primary influencers in their lives based on the results we have attained for ourselves.
By offering a new perspective, a different paradigm, a novel mindset, as well as a positive attitude we hope to positively impact those who accept that inner change must precede outer change and that embracing one's discomfort zone is non-negotiable.
By teaching how to leverage relationships, personal growth, platforms and opportunities that others dismiss by mere virtue of them being found outside of the hamster wheel, we empower people to build their own, rather than the boss' legacy.
Those that we choose to take under our wings, we are committed to for a life-time.
We are no gurus, we are not perfect (far from it), but we are hungry to give meaning to our lives and the lives of others.
We endeavor to utilize the concept of "Six Degrees of Separation" to develop and further growth-oriented mindsets across the generations to open the door for everyone who strives to create a life unencumbered by scarcity in any form.
Those that we choose to take under our wings, we are committed to for a life-time.
We are no gurus, we are not perfect (far from it), but we are hungry to give meaning to our lives and the lives of others.
We endeavor to utilize the concept of "Six Degrees of Separation" to develop and further growth-oriented mindsets across the generations to open the door for everyone who strives to create a life unencumbered by scarcity in any form.